Why Achieving Big Goals is So Rare.

Statistically, most people don’t ever achieve or live out their biggest goals and dreams.

They settle for less.

Desire for more, better or different is common and advice on everything is everywhere but ‘success’ at the level it’s desired is still very rare.


It’s commonly believed the headline formula for goal achieving is something like:

Have a clear, compelling vision or goal + plan + the right mindset + take consistent action + develop skillset, etc.

It’s what’s commonly taught.

It makes sense. It’s logical.

Yet the evidence tells us this isn’t the formula at all.

Because the realisation of really big goals and dreams is so rare.

Even among those who are highly capable, focused, driven and who turn to trusted and well known resources.

Most still do not ‘succeed’ as they’d really love to.

Some procrastinate, change their mind, get stuck, re-route or abandon ship.

Some take massive action and work really hard.

Some focus heavily on personal development and mindset.

Some do achieve some of their goals but often miss out on other aspects of life because they’re working so hard. 

Or perhaps sacrifice their health or relationships believing they’ll give this their attention when they have more time or money.

Whatever the scenario, the vast majority of people end up with a compromise relative to what they’d once imagined, desired and believed in.

And for many life becomes about ‘OR’ when what they really desire is ‘AND’’.

But Why?

The answer is uncommon but both true and remarkably simple.

It’s because of ‘non-acceptance’.

Or more specifically, the mind and intellect denying the heart’s acceptance of the desires.

And without the heart’s acceptance, it’s just not possible to succeed in the way our heart desires.

Without our heart’s acceptance, no amount of trying will do the trick.

What ‘non-acceptance’ boils down to is simply this.

Not allowing ourself to fully fall in love with our biggest goals and dreams.

Because our mind stops us.

For the mind, it’s just not safe to fall in love with and accept our heart’s biggest desires.

Partly because we’re conditioned and taught not to.

So the desire for something we’d really love no sooner appears in our heart than the mind begins to interfere.

Either rejecting the desire completely based on our conscious and unconscious (but misguided) beliefs.

Or attaching to thoughts of what we need or must do or how we’re going to achieve it?

Or why we can’t, why it will be difficult or will take X number of years etc.

And unfortunately we believe our own thoughts and feelings are real!

Not least because mind is brilliant at justifying its own stories around time, timing, money, ourselves, others or some other belief.

And then our mind literally projects the evidence of what it believes!

Mind loves using its tools of logic and reason as well as circumstances and history to derail our desires.

Time, timing, resources, memories, current circumstances, events, fears, etc..

Mind loves using them all to dismiss, bury or derail our boldest dreams. 

Or keep them forever rolling around in our intellect and mind.

Denying our heart’s acceptance.

And therefore literally denying our experience of our heart’s desires.

We may remain wanting and working towards whatever it is of course but wanting only perpetuates wanting.

Wanting is non-acceptance.

The mind is exceptionally good at this game too.

So much so we’re usually not even aware of its interference and tactics

It can be so subtle.

And our mind is on high alert for anything which may help us get it out of the way!

Part of the problem is we believe our thoughts and feelings and mental stories are real.

And so the mind gets to have its way.

Mind gets to become the CEO of our lives.

While our heart quietly suffers its relegation.

Our heart suffers our largely unconscious denial, resistance and non-acceptance.

Nonetheless we feel the resistance.

Often in the form of effort or striving or doubt or conflicting thoughts, feelings and emotions including stress.

It’s common. It often hurts.

What’s not common is to allow our heart to accept.

Many of us don’t really know how.

Despite the fact that its really our nature and that it guarantees our success.

It’s also not common because it’s completely illogical… but that’s really the whole point. 

To achieve our biggest goals and dreams with ease, speed and certainty……

We must do what ALL the highest-achieving entrepreneurs, leaders and individuals throughout history have always done.

Consciously or unconsciously.

Which is to throw logic and reason and what’s realistic out of the window completely.

Get the mind out of the way.

And accept the desire in their heart.

And let their heart lead them, not their mind.

So they’re not following their heart as much as they’re being actively led by it.

Meaning they’re identified with and fused with their heart’s desire.

And not with the limitations and BS of the mind.

Or with trying and striving.

Through this acceptance, they’re moved to the realisation of their vision, goals and dreams.

It’s so simple but again this is the problem

Mind loves complexity!

And trusting our heart is so contrary to what we’re taught.

We learn and are educated to value and trust our intellect.

And to believe effort and hard-work are necessary ingredients.

Which is precisely the reason dreaming and goal setting and endless striving are so much more common than goal achieving and actually living the dream!

Most ‘mindset’ fails us too…. because it treats the symptom at the level of the symptom.

Trying to change the mind with the mind is like trying to lift yourself off the ground using your own shoelaces!

Or like asking turkeys to vote for Christmas.

But the mind loves its endless spinning and story telling!

And mind loves hope because this is such an excellent decoy.

But the only way to experience what our heart most wants is ultimately to allow our heart to have what it brought to us in the first place.

Because heart beats mind every single time. 

So much so it’s said by both wise and ancient teachers that our life’s purpose is simply to get to know our heart.

So we can be heart-led and therefore discover the true origin and purpose of our heart’s desires.

When we become heart-led, we step into our innate power.

It’s no longer about ego or mind-led forcing, trying or pushing.

It’s no longer about the comparison game which causes so many people so much suffering.

It’s about the ease, flow and naturalness of being led. 

And in being heart-led, we get to experience our heart’s desires.

Including the inner-peace, happiness and fulfilment that is our true nature….

But which our mind has us so busy searching for!

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